Archive for the ‘w’ Category

Halloween Herfing JR Cigars Style

Monday, October 31st, 2011

Ah, another October 31st is upon us, the day where witches, ghosts, ghouls and goblins roam the skies, trick or treatin’ chillins’ roam the streets, and if I’m lucky enough, a gaggle of hot young mommies will also make their way to my front door for a little helping of Zman’s candy. (Yeah, right, in your dreams, ya tubby, cigar sucking, Polack bastid.)

I’ve always dug Halloween and many consider it their favorite holiday, yet I have maintained for years that it’s not really an official American holiday, just some crazy celebration started by a bunch of heathenistic pagans many moons ago. I mean, the post office and banks are open, the kids are in school, and everybody is working as usual. Now, Wikipedia describes Halloween as: an annual holiday observed on October 31, which commonly includes activities such as trick-or-treating, attending costume parties, carving jack-o’-lanterns, bonfires, apple bobbing, visiting haunted attractions, playing pranks, telling scary stories, and watching horror films. So while I’m not sure what constitutes a real honest to goodness holiday, it’s still a cool day for celebrating wicked and wacky stuff… and, oh yeah… it is one hell of a fine day for smoking your favorite cigars!

Halloween has been a great cigar-smoking day for me for as long as I have enjoyed the lavish leafy luxury. Here in north Jersey it’s generally classic fall weather somewhere in the 50’s, cool enough where I throw on a jacket and hang out on my front porch with a big fat stoag dangling from my face and a thermos filled with my favorite, um, medicine. Okay, while I hide the booze from plain view of the kiddies, I make no skeleton bones about it that I am a cigar smokin’ freakazoid, and if you don’t wanna bring your yard ape to my front door for a heavenly helping of diabetic coma inducing treats, well, hey, that’s your call.

When we used to live in a condo development in town, there were literally hundreds of kids who came to the door and I went through a dozen bags of candy. But now our house is on a back street and we’re lucky if we even get five trick or treaters. But that’s fine with me because there’s plenty of chocolate left over, and it’s a fact that my body actually needs chocolate – no, I’m serious, it’s a real medical condition where the candy’s sugar mixes with the cigar’s nicotine to give me the energy I need to make through another grueling day of blog writing. And as you might expect, a few belts of single malt makes the world seem even that much better. (Hint: Freeze Peanut Butter cups then dip ‘em in coffee… I am telling you that is one devilish treat!)

I’ll tell you what, with the state of the economy, I guarantee you that a lot of porch lights will be out and curtains drawn on the count of who the hell really has the extra dough to buy stranger’s kids a bunch of goodies? I know this makes me sound like an old fart, but damn, when I was a kid you got stuff like huge homemade popcorn balls, Three Musketeer Bars the size of a Smart Car, and there was always some sweet old neighborhood lady that came to the door with a tray full of luscious, oversized candy apples. I’m not exactly sure when, but you started hearing about sickos on the news putting bad stuff in the fruit and candy and people started scaling back to packaged goods only. Then after a few economic downturns, your Hundred Thousand Dollar Bar is worth even less than that Lucent stock you were going to retire on.

But cheer up, my buthas and sistas of Halloweendom, because JR has more treats than your pillow sack can possibly even handle and I personally plan on smoking ‘til the witching hour and beyond. The only howling you’ll be hearing at 3am is if the premium hand rolled treats run out before the candy does. So unless you have a hankering for Henry Clay, you’re jonesing for JR Alternatives, or pining for Punch… you may as well stay clear of my most frightening abode. But if perhaps you’d like to join me in a La Flor Domincana Air Bender or a ligero laced Cain F (yeah, that’s right, JR carries ‘em) then there’s a place on my front porch waiting for your arrival. There are no tricks, but only treats when the Zman holds his Halloween herf!


JR Cigars Blog with the Zman

Get in on this week’s Weekly Special!

If you spent too much on this year’s Halloween costume don’t worry! JR’s got you covered! Our weekly special gets you bundles of Famous Brand 2nds for less than $20 Bucks! Grab a bundle of the mild-to-medium-bodied creamy and smooth Dominicans or the medium-to-full-bodied, nutty and naturally sweet Nicaraguans…or both! You won’t be disappointed!


Looking for something?

Use the form below to search the site:

Still not finding what you're looking for? Drop a comment on a post or contact us so we can take care of it!